• Humor,  Just Plain Southern

    Things You Learn Living In The South

    THINGS YOU LEARN LIVING IN THE SOUTH  A possum is a flat animal that sleeps in the middle of the road. There are 5,000 types of snakes and 4,998 of them live in the South. There are 10,000 types of spiders. All 10,000 of them live in the South, plus a couple no one’s seen before. If it grows, it’ll stick ya. If it crawls, it’ll bite cha Onced and Twiced are words It is not a shopping cart, it is a buggy! Jawl-P? means, Did you all go to the bathroom? People actually grow,eat and like okra. There is no such thing as lunch. There is only dinner and then there’s supper. Iced…

  • Remember When Life Was Young
    Humor

    Remember When Life Was Fun?

    Remember When Life Was Fun All the girls had ugly gym uniforms? And wore tennis shoes not $200 Nike’s! It took three minutes for the TV to warm up? Nobody owned a purebred dog? When a quarter was a decent allowance? You’d reach into a muddy gutter for a penny? Your Mom wore nylons that came in two pieces? You got your windshield cleaned, oil checked, and gas pumped, without asking, all for free, every time? And you didn’t pay for air? And, you got trading stamps to boot? Laundry detergent had free glasses, dishes or towels hidden inside the box? It was considered a great privilege to be taken…

  • Think Before You Speak
    Humor

    Think Before You Speak

    Think before you speak…Here are six reasons why you should think before you speak – the last one is great!Have you ever spoken and wished that you could immediately take the words back..Here are the Testimonials of a few people who did…. FIRST TESTIMONY: I walked into a hair salon with my husband and three kids in tow and asked loudly, “How much do you charge for a shampoo and a blow job?” I turned around and walked back out and never went back. My husband didn’t say a word… he knew better. ***These only get worse so if you get offended by things like this, stop reading now! SECOND…

  • How To Stop A Gossip
    Humor,  Just Plain Southern

    How To Stop A Gossip

    How to stop a gossip. Most all of us have encountered or know someone that is a gossip, especially if you live in a very small town. They can spread a rumor faster than a forest fire. This story will show you how one man took this issue into his own hands and stopped a gossip fast in her tracks. Perhaps the next time you are faced with a gossip spreading rumors about you, you will remember this story. Perhaps it will give you an idea as to how to stop your own gossiper in his or her tracks. If you do, please let us know! We would love to…

  • Humor,  St. Patrick's Day

    A Little Irish Humor

    Walking into the pub… Patick said to the bartender, “Pour me astiff one, Sean. I just had another tiff with the little woman.” “Oh yeah,” said Sean. “And how did this one end?” “Well I’ll tell ya now when it was over,” Patick replied, “herself came to me on her hands and knees, she did.” “You don’t say? Now that`s a switch! What did she say?” She said, “Come out from under that bed, you gutless weasel (Thank you to our friend Dwight McKinney)   A ventriloquist is telling Irish jokes in Davy Byrne’s pub in Grafton Street, Dublin, when, O’Leary, an irate Irishman stands up shouting, ‘You’re making out we’re…

  • Chick-fil-A
    Family,  Humor

    My Mom’s First Experience With Chick-fil-A

    My Mom’s First Experience With Chick-fil-A Let me give y’all a little information about my Mom. She is 82 years young, only about 5 feet tall (she’ll tell ya that she is shrinking every year) and she is Italian! My Mom, Marilou, is a very strong woman with strong opinions and she isn’t afraid to share them whether you ask for them or not HaHa! She has had a few medical issues and we thought it best to bring her to the warm and friendly South so that we could not only help if she needed it but also to be able to spend as much time as possible with…

  • Now That I'm Older Here's What I've Discovered
    Humor,  Life After 50,  Life Lessons

    Now That I’m Older Here’s What I’ve Discovered

    Now That I’m Older Here’s What I’ve Discovered is a humorous look at many things that we learn throughout our lives. As we get older we learn some very valuable lessons, some of them truly funny when you get down to it. We hope you will enjoy reading. 1. I started out with nothing, and I still have most of it. 2. My wild oats have turned into prunes and all-bran. 3. I finally got my head together, and now my body is falling apart. 4. Funny, I don’t remember being absent-minded. 5. Funny, I don’t remember being absent-minded. 6. If all is not lost, where is it? 7. It’s…

  • The Mammogram
    Humor

    The Mammogram

    The Mammogram While conducting business at the courthouse, I overheard a lady (who was arrested for assaulting a mammogram technician) say, “Your Honor, I’m guilty, but there were extenuating circumstances…” The female judge said, sarcastically, “I’d certainly like to hear those extenuating circumstances.” I did too, so I listened as the lady told her story. “Your Honor, upon arriving at my mammogram appointment, I was met by this perky little clipboard carrier smiling from ear to ear. “She tilted her head to one side and crooned, ‘Hi, I’m Belinda‚Ķ All I need you to do is step into this room right here, strip to the waist, then slip on this…