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My Mom’s First Experience With Chick-fil-A
My Mom’s First Experience With Chick-fil-A Let me give y’all a little information about my Mom. She is 82 years young, only about 5 feet tall (she’ll tell ya that she is shrinking every year) and she is Italian! My Mom, Marilou, is a very strong woman with strong opinions and she isn’t afraid to share them whether you ask for them or not HaHa! She has had a few medical issues and we thought it best to bring her to the warm and friendly South so that we could not only help if she needed it but also to be able to spend as much time as possible with…
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Now That I’m Older Here’s What I’ve Discovered
Now That I’m Older Here’s What I’ve Discovered is a humorous look at many things that we learn throughout our lives. As we get older we learn some very valuable lessons, some of them truly funny when you get down to it. We hope you will enjoy reading it. 1. I started out with nothing, and I still have most of it. 2. My wild oats have turned into prunes and all-bran. 3. I finally got my head together, and now my body is falling apart. 4. Funny, I don’t remember being absent-minded. 5. Funny, I don’t remember being absent-minded. 6. If all is not lost, where is it? 7.…
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The Mammogram
The Mammogram While conducting business at the courthouse, I overheard a lady (who was arrested for assaulting a mammogram technician) say, “Your Honor, I’m guilty, but there were extenuating circumstances…” The female judge said, sarcastically, “I’d certainly like to hear those extenuating circumstances.” I did too, so I listened as the lady told her story. “Your Honor, upon arriving at my mammogram appointment, I was met by this perky little clipboard carrier smiling from ear to ear. “She tilted her head to one side and crooned, ‘Hi, I’m Belinda… All I need you to do is step into this room right here, strip to the waist, then slip on this…
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Life From The Seat Of A Tractor
Life from the seat of a tractor.. An old Farmer’s Words of Wisdom we could all live by……. Your fences need to be horse-high, pig-tight and bull-strong. Keep skunks and bankers at a distance. Life is simpler when you plow around the stump. A bumble bee is considerably faster than a John Deere tractor. Words that soak into your ears are whispered¦….not yelled. Meanness don’t just happen overnight. Forgive your enemies; it messes up their heads. Do not corner something that you know is meaner than you. It don’t take a very big person to carry a grudge. You cannot unsay a cruel word. Every path has a few puddles.…
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In Honor of Idiots
In Honor of Idiots Have you ever read the warning label on a product and thought to yourself “Well, duh!!!” Sadly, you have to understand that the reason that warning is on the product is because some idiot somewhere did that exact thing!!! Today…… we honor idiots! In Honor of Idiots . . . . In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods that demonstrate that many of them are alive and out there. On a Sears hairdryer — Do not use while sleeping.(That’s the only time I have to work on my hair.) On a bag…
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The Memorial Stone
The Memorial Stone This is a classic and women are going to love this. Be sure you read the story to the end. Wives and women are always with you to the loving end, keep that in mind. This takes place in an Alabama funeral home! Just when you thought you’ve seen everything … DEAD in his favorite chair (reclined), remote in hand .. Don’t miss the new, silky, black & gold pjs, slippers and beer! And are those a pack of Newport ‘s in his ashtray? AND the football game is ON! THE MEMORIAL STONE Billy died…. His will provided $30,000 for this elaborate funeral. As the last…
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The Confession
The Confession Children will be children and boys will be boys. I grew up Roman Catholic and this actually reminded me of when I was a child and some of the boys I grew up with. Yep, I absolutely could see some of them doing this. I hope this brings a smile to your beautiful faces! ‘Bless me Father, for I have sinned. I have been with a loose girl.’ The priest asks, ‘Is that you, little Joey Pagano?’ ‘Yes, Father, it is.’ ‘And who was the girl you were with?’ ‘I can’t tell you, Father, I don’t want to ruin her reputation.’ “Well, Joey, I’m sure to find out…
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Making That Extra Effort
Making That Extra Effort Making The Extra Effort I was due for an appointment with the gynecologist later in the week. Early one morning, I received a call from the doctor’s office to tell me that I had been rescheduled for that morning at 9:30 am. I had only just packed everyone off to work and school, and it was already around 8:45 am. The trip to his office took about 35 minutes, so I didn’t have any time to spare. As most women do, I like to take a little extra effort over hygiene when making such visits, but this time I wasn’t going to be able to make the…